2014 Record: 12-4
Those that worship at the altar of Peyton Manning, just ear muff it. If Peyton doesn’t win a ring this year, he is done. Tom Brady even said something along those lines in an email. Frankenquarterback can only last so long and furthermore, he just won’t. That being said, Denver is always a huge rival with the fine folks in Kansas City. The Broncos will have a tough time on Thursday Night Football against Kansas City in the one and only Arrowhead, and I cannot wait to be there. So let’s say best case scenario that Peyton has a great year and everything goes well but then they get to the playoffs (again) and then lose… will Manning retire? Probably not. I’ve come to decide that when you endorse a pizza as shitty as Papa John’s that you DGAF about quality, just quantity. After all, Peyton can’t sit through another family holiday with Eli wearing two rings.
GAT’s Season Prediction: 10-6
San Diego Chargers:
2014 Record: 9-7
Philip “Cry Me A” Rivers still has supporters around the nation and San Diego hasn’t burned everything to the ground. I am assuming San Diego is so happy with their team because they live in San Diego and wtf is there to complain about? Go boating or sit on a gorgeous beach and look at your gorgeous peers if you are upset over a football game. Personally I remember the SEVEN (YES SEVEN) sacks in the final game of the season against THE Kansas City Chiefs and the classic Rivers upset faces that came out of that game. Anyways, I’m sure there are other people on these AFC West teams but since I am such a gd homer you will not see me talk about anything other than my completely biased opinions. San Diego in general has better things to do than win football games and it shows.
GAT’s Season Prediction: 7-9
2014 Record: 3-13
My initial reaction is to cackle until my sides hurt but then I realize that one of those victories was over the Chiefs on a Thursday night in Oakland and I die a little inside. The freakin’ Raiders used all the power of Al Davis’ ghost and decided to show up late in the season to get a big fat W on primetime. I STILL HATE YOU FOR THIS OAKLAND! Then they went on to beat the 49ers and the Bills? WTF. So anyways, Derek Carr is actually rather likeable and I just feel sorry for him being on the Raiders. Now that they have Amari Cooper, things maayyyyy be different. Michael Crabtree is also in the mix, so I guess I am just bummed that Richard Sherman doesn’t get to complain about Crabtree being a baby back in the regular season. Maybe in preseason if Seattle decides they want to humiliate Crabtree one last time? Oakland has a long way to go in order to get back to the fearful team they were in the early 2000s, but maybe this upcoming season will be a step in the right direction?
GAT’s Season Prediction: 5-11
Kansas City Chiefs:
2014 Record: 9-7
Hello, how bout that ride in? I guess that’s why they call it Sin City. HA HA! Whew, does it feel good to be talking about the Chiefs again. Not that I don’t love the Royals and all the chaos they are causing the MLB these days…there is just something about football season that makes me feel alive again. Maybe that is the “drinking a keg before noon” tailgates talking, who knows. I am a first time season ticket holder this year (all other years were in my family’s name) and IT IS GOING TO BE MAGICAL! Maclin is straight up ghosting fools and Alex Smith threw deep into coverage at camp and it was broken up (of course) and Maclin STILL GOT THE BALL. This gives me hope for my less than favorite QB having a new target. Plus, ya know, Kelce is going to destroy even more this year. I’m way too excited about the season and going to go ahead and say that the Chiefs will win their home opener against Denver and that will set the tone for the rest of the season. So many hot takes on the Chiefs, I should probably just do an entire preview on them alone… sigh.
GAT’s Season Prediction: 11-5 🙂